I’m just… So tired in general. I don’t want to do this anymore.
I told my husband yesterday that I don’t want to live anymore. He made me promise to not kill myself and to think of what it would do to Damien and him.
I guess that’s the ultimate sacrifice, huh? Making sure others are happy at the expense of yourself. I just don’t know how long I can do this. I’ve been pretending I’m okay for years, and I’m sick of it. I don’t want this anymore. Nothing is going to happen in my life. And I see people every day, say “It’s natural selection, let them kill themselves.”
I’m hurting. And when I’m not, I’m numb. Being numb is so much worse.
I deserve whatever is coming to me.
I was over at my mom’s today, and was eating dinner with them. After her meal, she went outside and sat on the chair directly next to the front door. After about ten seconds, we hear a frantic, constant knocking. I get up to check on her, and she has her knees against her chest, curled in a ball on the chair.
"What’s wrong?" I asked, concerned. She had paled a bit.
"There’s a s-snake!!"
I look down, and there’s a foot long garden snake, dead, four feet from the chair.
My mother is terrified of snakes. She freezes up into a little ball and can’t think rationally.
So what did my stepfather do when he found a dead snake? He put it on their front porch, so when she went out to smoke a cigarette, she’d see it. I pick it up after nudging it with my foot and grinned.
"It’s dead," I said, stepping closer to her.
"Get it away!!" She shrieked, swatting at the air in my direction, but away from the snake, as if it would suddenly come back to life and devour her whole. I laugh.
"What should I do?"
"Throw it in the ditch!!"
"The cats probably killed it," I said, walking to the ditch and tossing it in there. We go back inside and Lon confesses to putting it there. She slaps his arm and I forget about it.
Until I go to leave.
I see the snake in the ditch and, grinning evilly, pick it up and put it on the door handle of her car. I’m giggling maliciously to myself and start the car, then hear a shriek.
"KAYLA!! ELIZABETH!! GET THAT THING OFF OF MY CAR!!"
I briefly thought about peeling out of the driveway, but she looked MAD. Still laughing, I pick up the snake, my mother shrieking at me and yelling how evil I was, much I the alarm of her neighbor who was outside at the time. I held up the snake.
"She’s scared of snakes," I explained before tossing it back into the ditch.
I’m now grounded.
Have you ever come across a homeless individual and felt totally uncomfortable?You see them and you know they are in need, but you are not sure what to do. You know that handing them money is not the best thing. But, you also see that they clearly have some needs. Their lips are chapped. They are hungry. They are thirsty. They are asking for help.How can you help?Here is a simple idea - blessing bags.
This was such an easy project. We are now going to keep a few “Blessing Bags” in our car so that when we do happen to see someone on the streets who is homeless, we can hand them a Blessing Bag. I first learned of these bags from my friend, Julie. I am using the picture of her bags (see above) because the ones we took were taken in horrible lighting and turned out really grainy and hard to see what is inside of them.If you’d like to make your own Blessing Bags, this is what you would need:Gallon size Ziplock bagsitems to go in the bags, such as:chap stickpackages of tissuestoothbrush and toothpastecombsoaptrail mixgranola barscrackerspack of gumband aidsmouthwashcoins (could be used to make a phone call, or purchase a food item)hand wipesyou could also put in a warm pair of socks, and maybe a Starbucks gift cardAssemble all the items in the bags, and maybe throw in a note of encouragement. Seal the bags and stow in your car for a moment of providence.This would be a great activity to do with some other families. Each family could bring one of the items going into the bags (ex: toothbrushes). Set up all the items around a table and walk around it with the ziplocks and fill the bags.
oh man i wanna do this
mee tooo. im bout to go to the dollar tree and rack up or a wholesale store.
All these reblogs make me so happy to see. So many amazing people on tumblr
random acts if kindness
please include a couple pairs of socks actually! Socks are among the most highly desired clothing item for homeless individuals
Similar to project we see you, which I love.
Gonna do this
Work is stressful enough, but I have to come home and fight a battle just to get anything done? I get home at three in the afternoon and my son will be soakin wet in pee, and tell me he’s hungry while my husband lies in bed.
He doesn’t even try to please me in bed anymore, either. He gets off, he’s done. His spare time is used working on his music. He doesn’t cuddle with me anymore, and demands that, even though I work more, I should be cooking and cleaning.
And then he gets pissed that I bought myself sex toys. You can’t fucking expect me to live off of ten seconds of sex (literally) and not be an angry bundle of nerves. The only time he ever even TRIES to be remotely sweet is when he thinks I’m going to leave him.
Can’t I just cuddle with my husband without him fucking groping me?! MY BOOBS NO LONGER RESPOND TO STIMULI!! That’s how much he fucking touches them! My goddamn fucking nipples are fucking numb because he’s always fucking messing with them!
I’m so angry and sexually frustrated right now, I’m about to cry. I didn’t sign up for this. This was supposed to be 50/50.
That’s it. That’s the post. I’m grumpy now.
This post has been cross-posted to The Asexual Agenda.
Content warnings: mentions of sexual violence, but no specifics
Fellow aces, we need to have a discussion about how we treat sex-averse and sex-repulsed aces. Sex-repulsed and sex-averse aces are by no means a…
I got into a mosh pit last night and got pushed around a good bit.
I’m in a lot more pain than I’m letting on. My shoulder hurts, my chest and ribs hurt, my left knee and both feet hurt, and I’ve got like 50 new bruises.
OW. I still feel awesome emotionally though lol